Crouching Tigger Hidden Nailfile

And here is my first entry into what will surely become a future Olympic Sport (but not next year, as they're.. rant rant rant...)

So, she isn't my partner, she's Tigger, my sister, but I'm quite sure it still counts. Here she is looking for some cosmetics. Also, Superdrug is not really a supermarket either. In fact, I don't think this is a valid entry at all.

COMPOSITION: Well, Considering it contravenes most of the laws of the game (subject is not my partner, location is not a supermarket), I don't think the photo's too bad. There's an annoying black spot on the tile by her foot, but I do like the way the floor tiles and the line of the shelves run off into the distance, drawing the viewer's eye up the aisle. The lighting isn't too bad and for a camera phone, the shot actually came out okay.

I'm going to give this ●●●●●●○○○○ (6/10)

POSE: Great pose. I call it "Crouching Tigger, Hidden Nailfile". She's cradling the febreeze as Indiana Jones would cradle solid gold Sun God Idols whilst tinkering with some unseen boobytrap in a wall. Speaking of which, Stop looking at my sister's boobies.

I think for pose, this gets a ●●●●●●●○○○ (7/10).

HAIR REMOVAL

This is a long distance shot as I wanted to get the giant Nivea tub in. It doesn't really show and lools like a normal tub in the foreground.

I also didn't get the shot straight and it looks like the shop's on a hill. I could say that I was attempting the "Canted Angle" shot that Cubinoid used in an earlier post, but nope, it was accidental. Also, the broken shelf at the back of the store detracts from the regimented lines of bottles, the floor tiles and  general linearity of the shot. Sloppy. But I did like the big sign above her that reads "Hair Removal". Is too much hair such a problem that it warrants its own aisle in Superdrug? I was impressed at just how many ways there are for getting rid of bodily hair and the millions of products available with which one can do so.

So, COMPOSITION: Not great. Slightly out of focus (dirty lens on my camera, I think - It doesn't have a lens cover so is succeptible to finger marks and other crap.) The things mentioned above detract as well (broken shelf, failed Nivea, wonky camera).
 I'm only giving this
●●●●○○○○○○ (4/10)

POSE: Nothing special here. No fancy footwork or anything. You can't see what the item is properly It's basically, an average photo of somebody shopping.
●●○○○○○○○○ (2/10).

OVERWHELMING RESPONSE

Well, firstly I want to say a big thank you for the overwhelming response I had to the last post. As you may recall, I have lost my old phone charger and the current bit of telephonic gadgetry I am using is so old and crusty it doesn't even take photos.

When the first iPhone arrived in the post addressed to me, I thought there had been some mistake, and when I realised, I was really overjoyed - thank you so much! Then, when the second phone arrived (not an iPhone, but still quite nice), I was amazed. You could have knocked me down with a feather. Now I am sitting here with no less than five pretty new phones with which to take new photos in order to keep the Supermarket Game going! I am amazed! Thank you so much!

Please stop phoning me though. It's a little annoying, because I don't know which one to answer.

Anyway - on to the game!

I haven't actually managed to use any of the new phones just yet - however another Supermarket Game reader actually managed to reel off a snap on THEIR OWN phone and it has ended up on my desktop. Thank you Miss JH from Surrey.







Composition: Could do with a little work on getting the old phone level, I'd say, but it's not half bad for a first attempt. 
Pose: Pretty impressed actually. Who can squat like that? And reading the ingredients on a pack of wipes? 

Remember, you too can join in the fun if ask me...drop me a line at Supermarket Game HQ, or find me on Facebook. I want to see more of YOUR photos up here - especially as I am photographically disabled right now. See you next time on...THE SUPERMARKET GAME.

Phoneless

We had a springclean, the missus and me. I told her not to tidy the cables and things that are near the computer table but would she listen? I tell you, she's got a mind of her own. Anyway the upshot of it all is that I can't find my phone charger. The battery has run out and we're off to the supermarket as usual, and there's me without a phone. I remembered that I have a really old phone that I hardly ever used, so I quickly charge it up one bar before we go out.

The next thing I know, I look at the phone only to find it has NO camera on it at all! Just a funnel for putting the coal in one end, and a crank handle to get it started.

Anyway, quick as a flash, I borrowed the other half's posh video camera. It does video and you can take still shots from it too, and I managed to get some rather decent shots in my opinion.

Not bad this new fangled technology. Doesn't make phone calls though, but it filled a gap whilst I search for the phone charger.

Here we go then!


Fruity
Long shot from the fruit aisle. I was just warming up with this shot really. Nothing fancy. A trifle conservative if you ask me.




Reduced to clear
Here we have a lovely shot from a high angle of the missus checking out all the wonderful reduced products...all the out of date stuff that ASDA are about to throw away but reduce to 17p in case some mug wants to buy last months Salt Fish Patty. But it was 17p though.


Back view
I realised I didn't have a decent back view for my portfolio, and this took quite a bit of "boxing about" to get the camera into exactly the right position. Not bad, but there's more to come...


Remote control
Okay, now there is a remote control hanging our of the back of my wife there. Let me explain. So many of our fans write to us here at The Supermarket Game Headquarters asking for particular poses...some of you lovely people out there go one further and even send in props for the missus to wear during our supermarket expeditions. Well, one of our fans sent in a pair of lazer ear gadgets...you wear them in your ears and they can shoot flippin' laser beams out of your ears! Well, I couldn't believe it. But, I managed to install the things into the ears without too much fuss, but the tricky part was taking the snaps without the missus knowing about it.


Lazer ears
It's like something from James Bond, isn't it? You just don't know how hard it is to press the buttons on a remote control that is realistically one foot away or less from the lazers, and still get enough distance from the subject to attain a shot like this. Arms length in both directions, if you follow. I blocked a whole aisle to get this tricky shot. Now look - you see the green thing above the red lazer ear? I thought it reminded me of a traffic light, so I worked really hard on getting something green UNDER the red light for the next shot, so it would look even more like traffic lights. Ready?


Laser ears / traffic light
Super eh? If you count her brass button as an amber, you have a traffic light right there in aisle 3 of ASDA.


Standy up thing for stacking the top shelf.
Every store worth its salt has one of these things. It is like a beheaded R2D2. A stool without legs, just tiny wheels underneath. If you apply weight to the thing, it stops rolling around and you can stand on it. I stood on this one just long enough to take this extra high angle shot.


----- BONUS GAME! -----

ASDAs little helper.
Another fan of the Supermarket Game asked us some time back if we could include a picture a shelf stacker...so here is the BONUS GAME! I have been toying with the BONUS GAME for a while, thinking it would be worth a point for each store employee you manage to get into your shot.


This is worth only one point, BUT it is a double whammy because if you look you will see that little ASDA shelf stacker is controlling the remote for the lazer ears wired into my wife's brain! Fantastic.


No marks for Composition or Pose this time, because I feel it's cheating - I took video and sifted through to find the best poses. Not the same as waiting for the moment with your phone camera...Wonder if I'll ever find my charger again?

That's all for now, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Keep sending your letters and postcards in, and remember - you too can join the game if you wish to join in the fun. Just drop me a line and ask, and I'll show you how to get started playing THE SUPERMARKET GAME!

All we seem to do these days...

is eat out so the game has suffered somewhat.
Apologies to the many many fans of the supermarket game who have taken the time to write letters of concern to us here at Supermarket Game headquarters and even those of you who have sent ready-meals.

But, honestly. The fridge is still full, but the kitchen is full of fish and chip wrappers, and empty cartons of Chinese takeaways. The last time we went shopping we ended up looking at clothes...and I did manage to reel off this snappy snap, but that's all I have for you, folks. Really. It is a sad day for the Supermarket Game.

On the plus side, there has been some interest from a few fans of the game wondering whether anyone can play, and of course, you can. Send me a message and I'll show you how to join in the intense fun and action.



Composition:  A bit blurred. Not too impressive. This isn't like riding a bike, you know. I'm a bit rusty to be honest.
Pose:  (Sigh) To me, it just looks like she is explaining about the size of a fish she has caught to a agoraphobic dwarf.